“Resistance Brings Disharmony”

TonyTimNMeBack in those chaotic days of self-abusive destructiveness, I always thought that the addictions, and the consequences I suffered from those addictions, were a part of my identity, a part of who I am. Now I know that none of it is related to who I am as a human being, it is all directly proportionate to the amount of resistance that I’m generating towards my true self. To some of my readers, this may sound like a riddle, or pure poppycock, when I imply that I am resisting being myself, but I can assure you that I have tested and retested this theory thousands of times before coming to this conclusion. So, how does it work, you might ask. How does a person resist being themselves? The answer to that question, is one that we each need to find for ourselves through deep introspection, but I can tell you the answer that I’ve found for myself, and you can try it on to see if it fits for you. Throughout my life, I’ve worked hard to cover up my feelings of unworthiness. Hiding fears that I would not make the grade, accomplish my goals, or be accepted just the way that I am, imperfections and all. I’ve learned that the false self (some call it ego), created by my mind in order to disguise all of my perceived inadequacies, in other words, the mask I created to fit in with the rest of society, was as poisonous to my true nature as the alcohol and drugs I used to repress those same feelings of inadequacy. Upon discovery of this tyrannical impostor that my own mind had created to FIX me, I decided to boot the bastard to the curb. To put it simply, I told my mind to fuck off. Yes, that is very strong language, indeed! I intentionally used it to attempt to rattle some conscious awareness into anyone who has continued to read this blog o’ mine. In truth, I continually told my mind to shut up, back off, get lost, and many other commands that I’ll leave to your ample imagination. Here’s the thing – It worked! I finally achieved some inner peace and quieted those monotonous tapes droning in my head, the ones constantly telling me just how unworthy I was. I found a way to love myself, just the way I am. No more apologies, no more disguises.

Tomorrow, I’ll get back to the story of submarines, blackouts and car wrecks. For tonight I will leave you all with this simple blessing – May you find every answer you require to live a joyful and abundant life, right here and right now.

Good night, all! 

2 thoughts on ““Resistance Brings Disharmony””

    1. It was a bit less than 10 years ago, when I discovered that I was so much more than the story I had created for myself. Until then, I carried all of the wreckage of my past on my back, like an enormous tumor. It was overwhelming my true nature. I discovered my true self through the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, while reading and meditating on the Power of Now. It was only on Thanksgiving day of last year (2017), that I fully surrendered to the truth of Being One with all that Is.

      Liked by 1 person

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